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| "白領" 階級 的意思~ "嫁妝" 就是丈母娘給女婿的回扣。
"代溝"就是我問老爸覺得"菊花台"怎麼樣，他說沒喝過。
"自戀"就是下輩子我一定要投胎做女人，然後嫁個像我這樣的男人。
"無語"就是法官問：你為什麼印假鈔？罪犯說：真鈔我不會印。
"約會"就是一對男女展現自己前所未有的精湛演技的時候。
"天堂"就是所有的女人都在，只有你老婆不在的地方。
"無奈"就是被狗咬了一口，卻無法反咬一口時的感覺。
"醜聞"就是當你帶一個醜八怪女孩出遊，就會聽到周遭的人所說的話。
"絕望"就是飯館吃飯點了兩菜，吃第一個："世上還有比這更難吃的嗎？"吃第二個： "靠！還真的有！"
"白領" 就是今天發了薪水，交了房租、水電瓦斯費，買了油、米和泡麵，摸摸口袋剩下的錢，感歎一聲：
這月薪水又白領了！
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The Man Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
Finally , the guys' side of the story
( I must admit, it's pretty good)
We always hear
'the rules'
From the female side
Now here are the rules from the male side
These are our rules!
Please note.... They are all numbered '1' ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports - It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.. Let us be clear on this one! Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us..
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have NO idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really!
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as football, sex, hooters, or fishing.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape! Straight IS a shape! Flat IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh.
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| While commenting on Aquilani's debut for Liverpool in the reserves team, somebody wrote
He was more impressive in 15 minutes than Lucas' entire Liverpool career.
which is quite true...
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| always fun to read over what u wrote in the past :o
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| Me likes copying :D The clock is running.
Make the most of today.
Time waits for no man. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery.
Today is a gift. That's why it is called the present. ------------------------------------------------ http://www.nydailynews.com/money/2009/10/19/2009-10-19_six_states_sue_feds_over_16b_in_wwii_bonds.html HELENA, Mont. - The federal government is facing a lawsuit over $16 billion in unclaimed bonds dating back to World War II in a showdown between states and the Treasury Department. Most American families bought at least one bond during the war, and many never cashed them in - thanks in part to a 40-year maturity period. More than $16 billion worth of the bonds are unclaimed. The attorneys general of six states, including New Jersey, are suing the Treasury Department, charging that the federal government made no effort to find the bondholders. They want the money given to the states, which have a legal system in place for finding the owners of unclaimed funds. "It's better for the millions of Americans who are the rightful owners to have it returned to the states, because the states will make a real effort to find them," said David Bishop, a lawyer representing the states. The Treasury Department, which claims ownership, says it has a Web site where people can simply type in their Social Security number to see if they own any of the unclaimed bonds. ----------------------------------------------- so hungry for the money LOL | | |
| A blonde with two burnt ears went to the doctor, who asked what had happened. "The phone rang, and I accidentally picked up the iron." "What about the other one?" "They called back." --------------------------------------- Nothing against blondes, but that's the way I copied it... :x | | |
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